finding my smile (and a beautiful kids’ art project)

Friday, June 1, 2012 – Filed under: Uncategorized ::

I could feel the edges of my perspective fraying and separating, leaving gaps of fibre and feeling that just didn’t feel comfortable. Didn’t feel rooted. Or right.

Those days, I remind myself, they happen to everyone. The days we just can’t seem to find our smiles. Or confidence. Wondering, worrying what – how we are doing, how I am doing, as a parents. Whether the choices I’m making are even in the ballpark of being right. For us. For my littles. Thinking about our homeschooling next year and feeling – in so many ways about so many aspects of our life – like an island in a sea of other.

Feeling my own frailties, knowing that my insistent search for justice can cut both ways and isn’t always appropriate, or needed. Reminding myself that it’s ok to leave things alone, knowing they are far less than ideal or right or fair or sustainable.

Wondering how far our conscious choices and attempts to parent that way will take us. Wondering how to find my smile again and feel whole.

As the world spun in my head, and all around me, I stopped to breathe and saw my littles, fully present and engrossed in their play. In a mess of books and toys and every block we own (and some I’m sure we don’t). Cutting ourselves slack – cutting myself slack – doesn’t always come easy. But it’s so important, and I’m going to try. A little harder. To try a little less. Overall.

I watched her paint, helping her to set up lightly pencil-drawn hearts on a big piece of watercolor paper. With a simple set of watercolor paint pads, she started with one color (like yellow or red) and mixed the other colors in, trying progressively to get darker and darker, each heart turning out a wonderfully (subtly) different shade.





6 Responses to “finding my smile (and a beautiful kids’ art project)”

  1. Ren Lady Of The Arts Says:

    Lovely art project.

  2. Jennifer | The Deliberate Mom Says:

    What a lovely art project!

    Wishing you a wonderful weekend!

  3. Rosa Says:

    Wow, that’s such a lovely project! It’d make a wonderful fabric print too :)

  4. Laura Says:

    Beautiful! I love those hearts.

  5. Margaret B. Says:

    Oh, my dear, a perfect art project to lift a care-worn heart…

  6. dionne Says:

    What a simple and beautiful exercise/piece of art.